Bulldog 1, this is Bulldog 7
We are two clicks out from target.
Area looks clear, over.
Roger Bulldog 7, we are Oscar Mike behind you, over.
Copy that, Bulldog 1.
See you on the other side. Bulldog 7 out.
Dumbasses will get lost.
We'll have to take out Haji all by our lonesome.
That's hella profound.
All right, let's move out.
Christ.
Sarge, are we seeing this?
Give me the binos.
No problem, Major Filk.
Always good doing business with you.
Son of a...
It's Major Filk and Captain Barnes.
Tell your boys to be careful with the Claymores.
I'd hate to have to deal wi a bunch of new faces.
- Let's go. - Two weeks ago, they're
bitch-slapping non-coms over gut-busters and widow-makers gone missing.
We know where they went missing to.
- Hell do we do now? - Our job.
Soon as Haji clears out, we get to the target.
- What about Filk and Barnes? - One enemy at a time.
Get down!
Get out!
Stay low.
Mike!
The summer after first grade,
my neighbor taught me how swim.
Mrs. Duane, on dry land,
was a sumo-sized single mom and CPA.
Five feet from the edge of th end, she was my own personal safe harbor.
Holding out her stay-puft marshmallow arms,
she'd say, "Close your eyes, count to five, take a breath, and jump."
What came next was a frantic mix of kicking and gulping
and bubbles and gasps.
Slowly, but somewhat surely,
I made it through my turquoise-colored panic
and into her waiting arms.
Not because I wasn't scared.
Because she wasn't.
Days like this, it's all worth it.
It's always worth it. But days like this...
What's worth it?
The job, the slog.
Con men and turncoats. The low-level grunt.
Guy sees his superiors selling arms to the enemies.
Coulda looked the other way.
- Like you with me stealing pens? - Instead he stands up,
turns in the guys on the other side of the salute.
What's he get in return? Death threats.
His career is shot to hell. A one-way ticket to WITSEC.
- It's better than Fallujah. - That's our new bumper sticker, right?
It's either that, or "WITSEC, not for mobsters anymore."
He's a bona fide hero.
A little less at ease,
more attention.
Boy.
U.S. Army Special Forces, three tours in Iraq, Afghanistan.
Multiple commendations for bravery.
Distinguished Service Cross.
- My husband doesn't feel he's worthy... - Sue...
Sergeant Loverro is in a coma on life support.
Chest candy's pointless if the rescue's not successful.
I wouldn't say that.
The criteria for the cross is based on actions,
not outcome, and your actions in saving Sergeant Loverro
meet that criteria and then some.
- As you were. - Thank you.
Wish I could get our other witnesses to do that.
Does your friend have a name?
Marshall, Mary, this is...
Major Lucas Provo, JAG attorney for Sergeant Shears.
- Inspector Shannon. - Inspector Mann, welcome.
Okay, so...
I see everyone's settled. Everyone good?
Good.
This is to make official that you will be discharged
from the U.S. Army.
You are entitled to receive any and all benefits due you.
- Thank you. - The Army is coordinating with DOJ
to get your entitlements.
Yes, we are. Yes, just...
plain yes.
Smooth.
Good. Now...
Once we get you and Mrs. Shears in quarters, the order will be...
- Mr. Provo... - Major
Provo.
Sorry, I have no doubt that you're good at your job,
and less doubt that we're good at ours. And protecting Mr. Stills...
not Sergeant Shears... that's ours.
- You okay? - I just felt much safer on the base.
The Army doesn't have its protection. We're pretty darn good at this.
If you follow a few simple rules, safety won't be an issue.
If there's anything you need, you can contact us day or night.
- I'll be taking the lead on your case. - For the record, it was my turn
to take the lead.
But I've got a bit of a situation here.
You're not the only one who has to follow a few simple rules.
Once we get you settled in...
As much as your input is appreciated,
military protects military.
On this operation, I'm running point.
I'm no lawyer, but I've got a pretty good handle
on matters of jurisdiction.
- Back me up here. - Actually...
- Not the "actually" face. - Not my favorite face.
Yeah, well.
I went back and forth with DOJ. The Army's going to run this.
- With our input. - Our input? What a crock of...
We all have a chain of command.
I've formulated a detailed plan for the witnesses' security.
- It's all outlined in here. - Wait.
- It's all in there? - Easy.
That's great.
Your plan that's all in there
is perfect in theory,
but theory goes out the window in Witness Protection.
- It can get messy. - Inspector.
I have spent plenty of time with messy.
In my world, theory goes out the window every day.
- He doesn't get it. - Stop.
Everybody stop.
You're talking about it like we're not here, like it's nothing.
Our lives are gone.
In the Army, we were safe.
At least I thought we were.
My husband can't do this. I can't do this.
John. Let us.
Go on. Take the lead.
Messy, right?
What's your big book of plans say we do when the wife
runs crying out of the room?
Since 1970,
the Federal Witness Protection Program has relocated thousands of witnesses,
some criminal, some not, to neighborhoods all across the country.
Every one of those individuals shares a unique attribute
distinguishing them from the rest of the general population.
And that is,
somebody wants them dead.
The Witness Protection Team presents:
Season 4 - Episode 11 Provo-cation
I had hoped that Sue would be the least of our worries.
Wives start over, dealing with new environments.
- The quick assimilation. - But she's not an Army wife.
This isn't just hopping from base to base.
- I get that. - Do you?
My mom was an Army wife for 30 years.
She's now a full Professor at Johns Hopkins.
Life beyond the base.
Any suggestions how?
What are you asking him for? He's the problem, not the solution.
How do you figure?
You work for the people John's testifying against.
Your DC office is a huge security leak, and "potential" is being kind.
There's no conflict of interest here. The JAG Corps prosecutes criminals,
period, like DOJ.
Criminals who draw paychecks from the same company you do.
We get paid by the government.
All right
We are fast-tracking this case with the support
of the Army and Congress.
The accused, meanwhile, are in the stockade awaiting court-martial.
Those guys don't have any reach? The stockade doesn't have any phones?
I don't disagree, there are links in the chain of command.
That includes a small handful of trained operatives
who are out there, right this second, looking for John.
So if you want to keep him upright, I suggest you get on board.
On board?
Gosh, why didn't you say so? He just wants me to get on board.
You two. Cease fire.
You and Marshall are going to work with the Major.
Get John and Sue settled.
Great.
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
Our office is here to help in any way we can.
And...
call me Stan.
My God.
"Call me Stan."
- What? - No, I get it. It's cool.
A little uniform envy, that's nothing to be ashamed of... it's sweet.
You're a-twitter.
You're like an eight-year-old girl with a Shaun Cassidy poster.
We don't start, all right? The man deserves respect.
Of course he does. Just, you know.
Try not to salute.
Stupid.
Provo puts the "jag" in "jagoff."
I have something that'll take you from your current level of disgust
back down to your usual state of garden-variety grumpiness.
A document promising you'll never say "garden-variety grumpiness"?
Two free tickets to an isotopes game.
What gives? You live for minor league baseball.
Abigail booked us on ghost walk the same night.
Ghost walk. Lame.
- The woman loves a haunted house. - Haunted house, ghost stories.
It's a slumber party, what's next, pillow fight and a ouija board?
- Easy. - Sayin'. You bailing on baseball?
A big "c" compromise.
You mean sacrifice.
Compromise, in the romantic sense,
entails inaction
and potential loss, whereas sacrifice...
Stopped listening at "two free tickets."
The realtor lists the building as southwest contemporary,
but I'd say it hails more from the prairie school.
I was gonna say that. The prairie school.
So true.
Not secure enough.
I've got an ideal, why don't you bore our friends
with your version of the nickel tour?
I'd love to have a word with Uncle Sam.
Let me show you this landscape integration.
If you'll step back here...
We're trying to get these people settled.
And the wife, she's not calm.
She's about two minutes away from guys in suits with butterfly nets.
Those fishbowl windows may as well have a sign saying "Welcome, snipers."
An interior unit on the middle floor would be optimal.
If there were a direct threat.
We have our witnesses secured in a safe city
that a handful of people know about, two of them us and none of them snipers.
Unless someone's calling an ex or using an old credit card,
this is as optimal as it gets.
You see a skylight, right?
You know what I see?
I have a feeling I'm about to.
Two rangers hovering in a whisper-silent 500p helicopter.
They rappel down and breach this place in 30 seconds flat, and extract John
before Sue can say "one Mississippi."
I know we're just Army, but we do top secret pretty well too.
Really? Wikileaks says hi.
Seal team six and Osama Bin Laden tells a different story.
Inspector.
I want us to work together on this.
So when I tell you John's not safe here,
it's not hyperbole.
He's not safe here.
We're not safe?
- That's not what he meant. - I thought the point
of coming into this program was to keep us safe.
Of course it is, and you are.
Sue, listen to me.
No witness has been harmed when they stuck with the program.
Major Provo, he's just being a little extra cautious.
Trust me.
Do me a favor.
Find John, we'll load up, we'll go see those other places.
Great idea. Come on.
Unbelievable.
You win every argument with your boyfriend, don't you?
The practiced casual boyfriend drop-in.
I was kind of expecting more.
For the record, I prefer "condom-ly challenged ex-douchebag."
- So he's... - Awol, at my request.
Back there with Sue, bang-up job with the top secret.
You guys give lessons?
What Major Provo said...
Do you think we're in danger?
- I asked you a question. - I'm trying to watch TV.
- I'm trying to talk to you. - Jesus.
Not again, okay? Not again.
Get your rank posterior off my spot.
First me, now Oscar.
At this rate, you'll need an extension for the bed.
I like it.
It's homey.
Sue, everything okay?
- I can't hold him off! - Open the door, now!
Open the goddamn door!
I need you to get to a safe place. Lock yourself in any room.
I'm in the bathroom. Help me, please!
Listen to me, call 911. We'll be right there.
Sue? Sue?
I'm coming with you.
Mary, get Provo. It's Sue.
Open the door, now!
Damn it, open the goddamn door!
- Open the door! - Move away from the door!
Move away from the door!
John, that's enough.
They'll kill you if you don't let me in.
They'll kill you if you don't open the door now!
- Albuquerque PD... - They'll kill us!
- Easy. - They're gonna kill us!
- Easy. - You're okay?
No! Get off of me.
Easy.
- Has he ever hit you? - Never.
Not once. And he didn't hit me.
It's not what you think.
Have you seen a movie of the week?
If he was violent with you once, he'll do it again.
She's right, he will. This isn't about domestic violence.
'Cause it looks just like it.
From what Marshall said, this is a clear case of PTSD.
PTSD's a diagnosis. That's the why.
I care about the what, if you think the what isn't domestic violence...
I need to be with my husband.
John was in a dissociative state,
triggered initially by the movie blasting on TV.
All quiet on the Western front.
Couple that with the stress of Sue pushing on Afghanistan,
that's why he snapped.
When you got here, John was yelling "they will kill you".
- "They," not "I." - "They." Right.
So?
According to Sue, he's been battling insomnia.
Emotional detachment, disproportionate outbursts of anger.
- Guess what those are symptoms of. - Pregnancy?
Who made you the spokesman for post-traumatic stress?
2,000 Iraqis.
At one point during Desert Storm,
my unit engaged the Republican Guard for four days of sustained combat.
I watched thousands of them die. Literally thousands of Iraqis.
In four days.
- Jesus. - That's gotta take its toll.
You have no idea.
I got lucky. I got help.
I volunteer at Walter Reed,
talking to soldiers with PTSD.
So he's got PTSD.
He's still dangerous.
- So now what? - You tell me.
I'm riding shotgun on this one.
Inspector?
We work the program.
Find them jobs and a place to live.
And we get him help.
Well, I'll say this. We've never had so much room.
Don't you think, John?
- Yeah. - I'm gonna go out for a smoke.
He never smoked until Afghanistan.
Everyone there, and Iraq, they all did.
Just as a time-killing thing.
Listen, about last night...
Is everything in Albuquerque so brown or white?
Living on base,
I saw so many soldiers come home with it.
I saw what it did to their marriages.
And their families.
I knew it was possible,
maybe likely, but I just...
closed my eyes
and prayed that it wouldn't happen to John.
That it wouldn't happen to us.
I just want my husband back.
We're gonna do everything we can
to get John the help he needs.
You would have liked him.
Before. He was funny.
And charming as anything.
Everyone just loved to be even just around him.
You know?
Interior's secure.
- This place'll do. - This feel okay to you, Sue?
- Good as any. - Excellent.
Let's spread the word.
Good news, John.
Welcome home.
Listen, John.
With everything that's happened.
It might help to sit with it. Talk it out.
They have worked with a therapist.
I'm good. I was just...
Overtired last night.
Been through a lot lately.
Everything's fine.
Right.
- I think that... - I got it.
Can I talk to you?
They're all yours.
"Fine"? That guy's no one's version of fine.
I've seen too many defense lawyers manipulate
a witness with PTSD into ripping his own credibility to shreds.
I'm more concerned with him ripping his wife to shreds.
Me too.
If this case goes away,
traitors walk, and John's blown up his life and career for what?
He and Sue are a mess now...
Honestly?
I'm thinking is how I could eat my body weight
in blue corn enchiladas, soft beef tacos, and...
I'm gonna say a side of sauerkraut?
Who doesn't enjoy Mexican with a side of sauerkraut?
- Papas fritas con chile. - Thank you.
Soft beef tacos, and a blue corn enchilada.
- Cool, thanks. - You'll survive without the sauerkraut?
Yeah, you know.
Cravings, sometimes, you just gotta show 'em who's boss.
Snooze on this, I'll put it all away myself.
I didn't line my pockets with tinfoil
for nothing.
You know what? This is...
- This is nice. - Yeah? You should get out more.
I'm just happy to have a beer and someone to sit with.
I've been eating solo at P.F. Chang's all week.
So... John and Sue.
Am I gonna have to separate those two, or what?
I'm not sure.
You know, we train soldiers to tamp down their feelings,
so the fact that he's not keen on sitting down
with a shrink is hardly surprising.
Can't expect him to do a 180 and open up just 'cause it'd be more convenient.
Yeah.
You know, maybe you oughta flip through that big book of plans.
There's gotta be something in there, no?
You gonna let that go anytime soon?
Define "soon."
- You haven't asked me how I knew. - So we're speaking in code now, or...
How I knew you weren't married.
You know, the casual "boyfriend" drop-in.
Figured you didn't see a ring, you put two and two together.
How about you?
- How's that happen? - How's what happen?
Decorated war hero turned JAG lawyer,
spends his free time volunteering with wounded vets?
Come on.
There's no Mrs. A few good men?
There's gotta be a serious flaw in there somewhere.
I could never hit the curveball.
C'est la vie.
Ah, there it is.
C'est la vie is the flaw?
Hate it. Hate it so much.
Can I be blunt?
Not sure you can't be.
You can knock off the lonely bachelor eating solo B.S.
Albuquerque's endless supply of dopey hot co-eds,
and you skulking around in your crisp class "A"s?
Please.
Fish in a barrel have a better shot.
First of all, I rarely skulk.
- Answer the question. - You didn't ask one.
It was implied.
I'm holding out.
That's all you have to say?
Not all.
How's the rest go?
I'm holding out for something more.
For something more, you know? Smarter, messier, just...
Just more.
Funny.
I'm holding out for someone who doesn't bug the crap out of me.
I'm guessing that significantly drains the pool.
- You have no idea. - I have some idea.
- Do you? - I do.
You gonna be okay with this?
I'd be a lot more okay if DOJ had let me call in my guy.
We need an expert, not just on PTSD.
PTSD for vets.
You know this situation's unique. Bringing in an outsider's not doable.
Look, military PTSD isn't my specialty.
Provo probably knows more about it than I do.
So fine.
They want to coax this guy into staring down his demons,
give it a whirl.
This is all routine,
but I thought it'd be good for us to jump into our prep.
Iron out the kinks before we get in front of a judge.
Yes, sir.
I asked inspector Mann to stand in as opposing counsel... good for you?
Yeah.
John, just so you know, my girlfriend got me
a Law & Order box set for my birthday.
Fair warning.
- You ready? - Yeah.
We appreciate
your being here today, Sergeant, because you, more than anyone,
can shed light on what happened in the Korengal valley.
Only answer if the defense asks you a question, John, okay?
Okay. I'm sorry, sir.
So... let's go back to the events of that day.
You were on a forward scout with Sergeant Loretto...
Loverro, sir.
Right, sorry. Sergeant Loverro.
You two were on a forward scouting mission.
Correct, sir.
Questions only, Sergeant. Understood?
Right. Sorry, sir.
What did you see?
I saw Major Filk and Captain Barnes selling weapons to the Taliban, sir.
Allegedly selling, but we'll get to that.
What happened next?
We were dug in behind some rocks...
- You and Mark? - Me and Mike.
We were dug in, waiting for the field to clear before we pushed on.
And my team fired an AT-4 at Haji.
And all hell broke loose.
Get down, get down!
Define "all hell."
The enemy returned fire, sir.
Me and Mike were caught in the cross.
You and Sergeant Lawrence.
Sergeant Loverro. His name's Mike Loverro, sir.
Okay, you and Loverro were caught in the crossfire.
What happened then?
We made a run for it.
Stay low!
Mike!
Mike got hit.
How did you know he was down?
You were in the lead?
Did you see him get shot? How did you know he hadn't just tripped?
Stay low!
Was he shot before or after you went back for him?
Mike, wait!
Did you see the shot?
No, I...
Yes, I did, sir.
Which is it, Sergeant? Was he shot before you got there or not?
I carried him to safety.
When was Sergeant Lombard shot?
His name's Sergeant Loverro, God damn it.
Sergeant Michael Loverro.
And I killed him.
Go ahead.
During the firefight...
I didn't go first.
Mike did.
I gave him the wrong hand signal.
He jumped out before I could stop him.
He took the bullet that was meant for me.
- You don't know that. - I was lead recon.
Mike was my responsibility.
I go first.
Things get ass-ended in battle.
You go on instinct. You do your best.
You saved your friend.
If I had gone first,
Mike would be fine. He wouldn't be in a goddamn coma.
You had no way of knowing Loverro would get shot.
In the face of that, you rescued him.
You carried him on your back to safety.
You risked your life to save that of a fellow soldier.
That's not what a hero does?
I'm not.
Listen, John, everything you're going through,
it comes with the territory.
I know.
You're gonna come out of it.
Yeah?
Where?
Good question.
The next stop on Ghost Walk
is the Renfro mansion, built in 1890
by then-territorial governor Charles Renfro.
He sold it to James Madsen, a U.S. marshal,
who used the basement as a jail.
Did I tell you?
A ghost story about a marshal.
Perfect, right?
A home run.
Oh! Oscar!
Oscar!
Oscar? Oh, my goodness.
Is that my little Oscar-puss?
- Brandi. - Hey.
Sorry about that. He's still learning the leash.
So is she.
Yeah, that's okay... he's just excited to see auntie "bwandi," aren't you?
Yes, you are.
I'm Peter, Brandi's fiance. Have we met?
- She kind of arrested me. - That's right.
Family dinner. Got it. Yeah, that was fun.
Just doing my job.
So Ghost Walk.
Which one of you is the haunted house aficionado?
Guilty. Can't get enough of 'em. Since I was a kid.
Can you believe I'm marrying this?
Oh, hey, are you guys coming to the wedding?
I didn't know I was invited.
Don't tell me you got another plus-one on the side.
My invitation did not include a plus-one.
It does now.
Okay. I would love to.
I promise, I'll leave the cuffs at home.
- Please. - Hey, we should catch up.
They're almost at the Renfro mansion. I'm gonna miss that basement.
Okay, the sad part is, he's actually totally serious.
But it was really good bumping into you.
- We'll see you at the wedding. - Can't wait!
Let's move in together.
You, me, and Oscar.
Okay. I'll give notice tomorrow.
- I'm serious. - So am I.
- It's not too soon? - Marshall, he's a dog.
He'll adjust.
Your pants are vibrating.
This is chaffee.
On my way.
I'm first in, got it?
Thanks. Sorry. I gotta...
Go. I know the drill.
I like the drill. You wear it well.
Marshall.
- Is everything okay? - Everything's fine.
My evening just opened up unexpectedly.
I thought I'd stop by and see how you and John are doing.
What? Isn't he with you and Mary?
- Did he say he was? - Yes.
He came home for a quick bite around 6:00,
then left, said he was going to talk to you about job prospects.
We haven't seen him all night.
Was he acting strangely in any way?
Say anything out of the ordinary?
No, no. No more than lately.
My God.
Voicemail.
- Marshall, it's gone. - What's gone?
- The gun. - What gun?
The one he said you gave him.
Sue, we didn't give him a gun.
Please, please, please.
Just bring him home.
- I called Mary. She's on her way. - I know. Okay, great, thanks.
ESU Located John's rental heading north on the 25,
just this side of Raton Pass.
- He's going to Colorado Springs. - You sure.
Been keeping track of Loverro's progress, thinking I might add him as a witness.
- John went to see him? - Manner of speaking.
Loverro died three days ago.
His funeral's tomorrow morning.
Great, a guy with a Mountain of guilt on his head and a gun in his hand.
There's gonna be military there, everywhere he looks.
That's a lot of targets for a loose cannon.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Sue, look at me. Look. Here. Come here.
What I need you to do right now is sit still and stay calm.
We're gonna handle this, understand? You thinking what I'm thinking?
I'm thinking there are not a lot of commercial flights out of sunport.
Hey, Stan, sorry to get you at home.
We need a plane.
- Marshall, time. - Funeral's in ten.
Damn it, which way?
Marshall, use the nav. Punch in the address.
Hit "fastest route."
- What's the nav say? How long? - Nine minutes. Turn right.
Then shall the dust return to the earth,
from whence it came.
And the spirit...
Peace will be with your soul...
I don't see him.
Pull forward.
Hey.
Behind that tree.
I don't know what you told Stan, but you getting in harm's way?
I'm saying no. Stay here.
Aim.
Fire.
Aim. Fire.
I'll get in front of him.
- You flank. - Okay.
John. Hey.
What are you doing?
Think, soldier.
I just...
Come on.
I just...
I wanted to apologize to Mike's wife.
No, no, no, no. Drop it, John. Come on.
Come on.
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
For everything.
Will you please tell Sue?
Just slow down, soldier.
Think about what you're doing.
That's one of your men over there... You don't want to mess up his funeral.
Come on. Right?
You wanna apologize to his wife?
Honor his memory? Start now.
Think about his family, John.
Think about yours.
John, damn it. You did nothing wrong.
Loverro was a hero
who died for his country, gladly.
He knew when he signed on the line.
Look, you don't understand.
Six months of night sweats and a heart attack every time a car backfires.
You think I don't understand?
Come on, John.
I know the world of hurt you're in right now.
Not the exact coordinates, but I'm familiar with the landscape.
Look at me, John.
Look at me.
I can help you.
But you gotta put the gun down first, buddy.
Come on, come on.
It's okay.
It's all right, buddy.
It's okay.
It's okay, John.
Everything's gonna be okay.
I wasn't gonna hurt anybody.
I just...
I don't know what to do.
So...
So look. I'm gonna stay here with John.
- Clean up this mess. - Great.
Okay.
See ya.
Listen.
You know that thing I said before about you being the problem
and not the solution...
That's all you have to say?
Not all.
How does the rest go?
It was implied.
Hey. What's up?
I just wanted to make sure that you knew I invited Abigail to the wedding.
- Abigail. - Yeah.
- Marshall's Abigail? - Yeah.
- You know she arrested you, right? - She was just doing her job.
God, you're like a shark. You only move forward.
Anyway, we ran into them at Ghost Walk the other night.
She's really nice.
They're a really adorable couple.
Adorable.
They're a pail full of kittens.
You kidding me?
It's a mid-life crisis with a badge.
They'll probably be broken up by the time the wedding rolls around.
But seat 'em next to each other. It'd be fun to watch 'em.
Oh, I don't know, the vibe that I got...
What they said about Joanie and Chachi.
How'd that turn out?
Hey, I gotta go.
I'll call you later, okay? Bye.
- Mary. - Hey.
I forgot you were coming.
Oh, now, I forgot to tell you. So we're even.
Do you want to come in?
Actually, I can't. I can't stay.
I wanted to drop something off.
John's resting now.
Actually, it's... it's for you.
I just... I thought it couldn't hurt.
Well, what John's been through
and what I'm going through, they don't really compare.
Well, they don't have to. It's not a contest.
You've been through a lot too.
You've lost a lot. A life.
Family, friends.
I know it's going to be tempting to reach out to that old base of support.
Don't.
If you need to reach out, reach out to me, okay?
- Thank you. - Sure.
- Take care. - Bye.
Okay, great. Thanks.
Yeah. Bye, Luke.
Well, Provo got into it with Colorado Springs P.D.
They're gonna look the other way on the funeral incident,
concealed weapons charge.
So John's still on track to testify.
- Good. - Yeah.
Good. So...
"Luke" now. Interesting.
What's interesting? It's his name.
You two went to lunch?
I had to eat. He was there.
Whatever.
You make it sound so romantic.
Romantic? Marshall. Look at me.
Babar's sexier than I am.
Pregnant women are only less attractive to men who have never...
consummated with one.
Oh. What?
No. I mean, it wasn't my baby.
Blech, Marshall. Gross.
Look, if you're into that stuff, find a website.
No, it's complicated. I was in college...
You need to stop talking now.
What is all this?
What, you got a mope angling for new digs?
It's not for a witness. It's for me.
For me and Abigail, actually.
You and Abigail.
Interesting.
So who's renting the u-haul?
Still sorting that out.
We've both gotten pretty set in our ways.
Yeah, well...
How set in her ways could a 12-year-old get, right?
Point is, my place doesn't feel right to her,
her place doesn't feel right to me.
That's odd.
I mean, Abigail's so neat and girly,
and you're so neat and girly.
You know what I think.
It's not a sign that we shouldn't move in together.
It's a... a glitch.
- A glitch. - A bump.
A bump.
Here you go.
How about this place? The prairie-style one.
It's perfect.
Ask any aquaphobic six-year-old.
There are benefits to staying out of the pool.
You get to mock the nose plugs and the kickboards,
eat ice cream without watching the clock for 30 minutes after.
And the dry itch aftermath, the bleachy stench of chlorine
is someone else's cross to bear.
But sitting poolside as others splash around
can tempt even the most timid.
If you're feeling brave,
you close your eyes, count to five,
take a breath, and jump.
And you hope that someone stronger,
more currently reliable...
your own sumo-sized CPA...
will be there to pull through the kicks and the gulps,
the bubbles and the gasps.
You always work this late?
My current condition tends to limit my dance card.
Anyway, between a backlog of these after-action reports
and these marshal service pregnancy forms,
I'm doing paperwork for two.
Well, how about dinner instead?
Also for two.
You can't believe these forms.
That eager to get rid of me?
Hey, you know those little berets you guys wear?
You got any extra?
I gotta do something about Stan's uniform envy... He'd love it.
We'd really love it.
- Answer the question. - You didn't ask one.
Yeah, I did.
Your timing's crap.
Same reason I could never hit the curveball.
- Oh, really? - Yep. One dinner.
I'm on a hop back to D.C. in the morning.
It's just dinner.
You'll get me the little beret?
So that's a yes?
It was implied.